Saturday, September 01, 2007

The Big Ten Sucks

Michigan, this is why you weren't allowed to play in the BCS National Championship Game last year. Congratulations to the Appalachian State Mountaineers for pulling off the Upset of the Century!

(Kim speculates that when UF broke Ohio State last year, we also broke Michigan by extension. Plausible!)

Let the Lloyd Carr Death Watch commence....

ADDED: This is the best article EVER! Sample:

Wolverines coach Lloyd Carr knows who the Mountaineers are.

"We had the benefit of watching all their games last fall, so we know the strengths of their team," Carr said. "We know about their speed and about how well they play on both sides of the ball."

...

The Mountaineers and Wolverines are playing because Michigan needed to fill out its schedule when it was expanded to 12 games. Appalachian gets $400,000 from the Wolverines for showing up.

"We're just here for the experience," said one Appalachian fan, talking to a local in a hotel lobby.
EVEN MORE: How are the Big Blue fans taking this? How do you think? (Scroll to the bottom if you don't have much time, savor the whole thing if you do.) Samples:

From the poster "FIRELLOYDCARRNOW":
FIRE LLOYD CARR!!!!! HE IS THE WORST COACH EVER HE SUCKS MORE *** THEN A CHINESE PROSTITUTE. HE CANT RECRUIT FOR ANYTHING. HOW CAN HE GO FOR 2 TWICE IN THE APPALACHIAN STATE GAME HE COST US THE DOUBLE A TEAM. HE IS NOT SUITED TO COACH PEE WEE FOOTBALL HE SUCKS. NOT TO MENTION HOW HE IS SCARED OF JIM TRESSEL AND IS OT COACHED BY HIM EVERY YEAR. FIRE HIM NOW BEFORE HE MANAGES TO F UP NEXT SEASON TO. FIRE HIM NOW, NOT AFTER THE SEASON NOW!!! WE WOULD BE BETTER WITH A CHIMP COACHING THEN HIM. FIRE HIM NOW!!!! FIRE LLOYD CARR NOW!!!!! I DONT EVEN HAVE TO ASK WHO AGREES WITH ME BECAUSE EVERYONE DOES EXEPT THE AD AT MICHIGAN SO I GUESS WE NEED TO FIRE HIM TO!!!! [I left the spelling, grammar, and shouting uncorrected. This is the dreaded typing of rage!]
Followed immediately by this post from "lloyd must die":
i agree with every word you just said [followed by one of the rudest emoticons I've ever seen.]
God I missed football season!

MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE FARM: UF won its game, and didn't even need a whole game to do it. Game called on account of lightning in the fourth quarter.

SPEAKING OF BAD PREDICTIONS: The Orlando Sentinel has a feature called The Saturday Ticket, which lists all of the college football games with time, matchup, buzz about the game, the line, and a prediction. This week's edition was entitled "It's a feast of cream puffs", and the first line was this:
Noon Appalachian State at Michigan Wolverines will pile up the yards NL Michigan 48-3
There was no line on this game!

BEST BULLETIN BOARD SMACKDOWN: From a poster calling himself UrbanLegend:
When UF lost to Mississippi State that was it..Ron Zook was terminated! For your sake, I hope your AD has the balls to do the same thing to Carr. You could find a much better coach! If not learn to enjoy being a second tier program.

Please hire a new coach, we are BORED with beating Ohio State! We want a new challenge.
Truly, we ARE bored beating up on OSU. (Sorry Mark Daniels.)

Also, a lot of Michigan fans are saying that ASU had SEC-like speed. But that's not true - if ASU had that kind of speed, the final would have been more like 41-14.

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