Thursday, May 24, 2007

Amnesty International asks the Hard Questions

Questions such as "Who's got the worst human rights record?" It's a multiple choice question, not a fill-in-the-blank question. The three available choices are Darth Vader, Hobgoblin (of Spiderman infamy) and Dick Cheney (of George W. Bush infamy).

The correct answer to this multiple choice question is Dick Cheney, because the other two are fictional characters.

...

Actually, Darth Vader shouldn't be on this list at all. His alleged crimes? "Torture, enslavement of Wookiees, decimation of the Alderaanian civilization." First, as far as we know Vader never actually tortured anyone. He killed a few people, and he used truth serum on his daughter (and what parent wouldn't want to use truth serum on an unruly teenager?), but claiming he tortured anyone is a bit of a stretch. Furthermore, Alderaan was destroyed on the orders of the Grand Moff Tarkin. Vader was on record as opposing the "technological terror" known as the Death Star.

And enslaving the Wookies? Even if Vader had done this, WOOKIES AREN'T HUMAN BEINGS! Therefore anything Vader may have done to them could not have qualified as violations of human rights.

(For that matter, given that this all took place "in a galaxy far, far away" and "a long time ago", there wouldn't have been any actual humans around. The evidence is conclusive that humans evolved on this planet. Therefore Vader, Luke, Obi-Wan and all the rest could not have been homo-sapiens. It's just a case of convergent evolution of form.)

OTOH, if the Hobgoblin were real, one could make a good case against him because he was a fashion designer.

...

In some contexts, AI stands for "Artificial Intelligence". In the case of this poll question it stands for "Actual Ignorance".

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

"Oh, dear."

"Oh, I said, dear."

H/T: My wife, who promises to post more about this later. I may have more later too, if I can recover....