Thursday, January 06, 2011

Listen up, Knuckleheads - Names matter!

The Orlando Sentinel has a story today about four local men trying to make good - by robbing banks. Unfortunately they got caught after robbing five* banks. (Apparently they don't know that the best way to rob a bank is to run one.)

Anyhow, one of the young gentlemen goes by the moniker Crime Tyme. You might think that he's kind of giving the game away with such a name. Perhaps, although he might be looking to break into professional wrestling instead.

Nevertheless, Crime Tyme is actually an improvement over the name his parents gave him: Courvoisier Winetavius Richardson**. Truly, with a name like that the best he could hope for in life is to be a run-of-the-mill knucklehead. Just remember

Sticks and stones
May break my bones,
But a stupid-assed name
Can ruin my life.
* Crime Tyme and his buddies tried to rob a sixth bank. From the Sentinel:
The suspects, ages 17 to 22, would have knocked over a sixth bank in Lake [County] on Nov. 18, if it had not been for another unexpected twist: Workers locked the doors of the bank as suspicious men headed in their direction.
I'm waiting for the PC Police to have that bank shut down and the workers fired for racial discrimination.

** Really, Courvoisier Winetavius Richardson's parents ought to be sent to prison if he's convicted.

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